I got an email last week from a guy named James. He seemed nice enough… A 28 year old sales manager… Owned his own home, north of Atlanta. Super cute… Korean… We had great conversation.
We took it off the computer and to the phone and at first, it was a nice transition. Then the dude started texting. I have nothing against texting, in fact, I think, under the right circumstances, it’s better than calling. But it is no way, shape or form supposed to take place of an actual phone call.
If James had asked me out when we first started talking, we would have gone out last weekend. But he didn’t ask me until earlier this week. The problem with that is that, I’m a single parent and my son only goes to his dad’s house every other weekend. The weekends that he’s home, I don’t go out. I could get a sitter/drop the boy at my parent’s house, but the dude’s gonna have to be pretty special for me to do that.
In my last relationship, we dated for three years. During that time, I think I only dropped my son off my with parents for a few hours at a time, maybe three times. I have never paid for a babysitter.
So, when James asked me out for this weekend, I told him I didn’t think I could make it happen, but would love to make plans for next weekend when I had some free time. He understood, but after a couple of days, he was like “I really wish I could see you this weekend.” Sweet 
Right?
So, against the grain, I work it out for my parents to watch the boy child on Friday night for a few hours. I told James I could meet him around 7:30, but that, because of childcare, I needed to be heading home around 10.
“That’s so early!”
Um. Yes… It is… And I explained the whole situation to him. He was like “We’ll make the most of it. Do you want to just get a drink someplace?”
“Sure. Where?”
And this is when it the launch malfunctioned. The dude wanted me to plan the first date… Ok, I’m not some ultra old fashioned girl. I can plan a date. But c’mon… Nothing like put your laziest foot forward. I offered up a couple of options for bars that I knew and loved. He response: “That’s kind of far for me.”
I picked these particular places because they were a nice midpoint between where he told me he lived and where I’m currently staying. He informs me that he’s going to be working at the office on Friday, about an hour and a half south of the downtown area (which, interestingly enough, is more than two hours away from where he lives. Who picks a commute like that???) Anyway…
I told him that it was about half way. He proceeds to ask me what my zip code is… I guess to get verification of my location..??!! I said, “Why don’t we just wait until next weekend when I’ll have a lot more available time and we can make this work out a bit more smoothly.”
He sticks to his guns. “What is your zip code?” Again with the zip code shit! Dude. I’m over it.
(And I realize I forgot to mention that this entire exchange is occurring via text…)
I texted him back and said, “Thanks, James. But no thanks.”
And that was the last I heard of James. lol…
I really don’t think I want to date someone with children because it’s hard enough to hammer out my schedule and coordinate shit with PTA meetings, visitation with his father, etc… But, JESUS. Aren’t there any men out there that don’t have children that also have a bit of understanding about a single mom’s schedule??
