I vacillate back and forth on telling them/not telling them about the blog. On the one hand, I know that when I tell them about the blog, I feel more honest and transparent and upfront. I also have noticed that men tend to… Be less honest and less transparent and less upfront in return. It’s like, they’re on their best behavior because they know about the blog.

I get it, I do. Every dating blogger I’ve talked to is like, “Don’t try to date and write about it,” which seems… counterproductive to being a dating blogger.

Six in one hand, half a dozen in the other.

I do appreciate your input though. Thanks for reading!

1)
All of your photos except one are face shots. You are a pretty lady but some of those are not presenting you in your best light. When guys see a profile with only face shots a warning flag goes up: what is she hiding? I will not get into the superficial politics of body shapes and sizes, but guys want to have an idea if you are anywhere close to their preferences as a total package.

2)
I am also a single parent. The plain and simple fact is, it limits your options. People are shallow, people do not desperately yearn to help raise someone else’s kid. It is their loss. ’nuff said.

3)
Guys are just as insecure as women. Nobody wants to be fodder for your Date Wreck site. I think you are cute, funny, and most likely a wonderful intellectual sparring partner (but you are too young for me), but no way would I want to risk ending up as one of your stories on your web site. Before I would ever go out with you, I would make you sign a pre-dating agreement that you could NEVER say anything about me on your site no matter how well or how badly it went between us. What you have here is the online equivalent of a group of ladies at a bar who are all yukking it up, a group that no sane man on the face of this planet would dare approach to try to ask you out. So ‘fess up about the web site right up front, and do whatever it takes to remove a guy’s fear of being ridiculed should you not hit it off with him.

I’m thinking about what you said re: the rejection stuff and the boy-child stuff… Both are good points.

I really liked your explanation here, on the blog, of how going into a relationship looking just for friends isn’t any more honest than quick! stuff the bridal magazines under the couch cushions before the guy arrives! I also think your sensible words about rejection would be reassuring to a guy. None of that appears in your profile, though. We all know it, you know it, so it seems like it’s coming through, but it isn’t.

And I know I didn’t cover this well at all in my own profile either, so I’m guilty as well.

And regarding the boy-child – I think it might help to point out to potential dates that he will *never* even meet, much less have to engage in, pretend-insta-family type activities until things are a looong way down the road. Other people’s kids are a nerve-wracking thing for either gender to think about … maybe they hate ANYONE their parent tries to date, maybe they are brats, maybe they are going to demand more of me than I can provide … so pre-empting that by saying, “you aren’t even going to SEE my kid for many months” might allay some of those fears.

Jules