For those of you that are local and give me a hard time for not leaving the perimeter here in Atlanta, this post may help you understand why I don’t!
My friend Will is always being a big baby about me making fun of the fact that he lives in Cumming, Georgia. Well, of course, it’s an easy target because it’s called Cumming (!!) but also, it’s about 50 minutes north of Atlanta which, loosely translated in my head, is juuuust south of Canada. Fucking far.
This wreck, I found while on a fodder-finding mission yesterday. He lives in Canton, Georgia… Which, according to Google Maps, is four minutes CLOSER to Atlanta than Cumming. Oh for fuck’s sake!
This. This is why. This is why I cannot muster the energy to even consider, um… to even consider considering venturing out of the city for fun. I’m afraid it’s all like this out there… In the great big unknown.
(hold me)
So yea, maybe YOU are not some backwoods redneck with the same IQ level of the cows he has relations with… But this dude could be your neighbor! [shaking my head] Nu-uh. No way. No how.
great sex, with what u want – m4w – 20 (canton)
im a good guy ive never done any one wronge. im looking fore no strings attached sex. im into almost any thing thats straite and wiil do what u would like. so cum on an get some hot sex. i love oral too.
Great sex with what I want…? A tall, broad-shouldered man with a massive cock and a libido that will wear me out…? You know somebody? Because, darling… It’s not you.
Oh oh! I get it. I want to have sex on that chair there next to you, don’t I? That chair that belongs indoors but is, for some redneck reason, sitting on your outdoor patio…? Maybe I’m supposed to want to have sex with your go-cart? If tractors can drive on the roads out there in North Georgia, why can’t go-carts?
I can’t quite tell — craning my neck to the left to see his first picture has caused me to develop a slight crick in my neck — but it looks like he’s got a PAGER in his right pocket. It’s like, you know how third world nations are about a decade or two behind us with things like television and music and what not? Cell phones don’t really work all the way out there in Canton, Georgia so they rely on pagers to communicate. 143! The good news is that because he was able to get his pager used pre-owned, presumably from a doctor or a drug dealer circa 1996, he’s able to spend more money on YOU, ladies.
Step right up. You could be like this girl that he posted the picture of. Oh wait, no… No… That also isn’t what I want.
