He thinks I’m an Employment Counselor

I wrote this shortly after I re-created my profile on OKC. Before the bright shiny wore off, and before I was planning on writing for dw. I didn’t save any of the datestamp info, unfortunately. BUT!!! He does still have the exact same profile up.

It began slowly, but with a compliment:

kiddmikey

Your simply, bad ass , ps Beautiful picture.

Okay, so I clicked on the profile link to check him out. Maybe the punctuation problem was his way of emphasizing things. I barely made it out of the gate before I ran into the first two problems.

He thinks Im an Employment Counselor

This is the only picture of Mikey. It’s not a flattering picture. It makes me think of pissed off redneck stalker exboyfriends. Complete with rifle (water tower not included).

44 / M / straight / Single
Westland, Michigan (464 miles)

Uh, no. I have a hard time wrapping my brain around driving TWENTY miles for a date. Respond immediately:

EmPossibility Thanks for the compliment. That’s one hell of a drive for a date, Mikey.

You would THINK that would be the end of it. You would be wrong. However, the rest of his profile really doesn’t matter to me because…

kiddmikey5 How’s North Carolina Em, Find me a job in the steel business, and it don’t have to be.Your glasses add to the Pretty.

Clearly, this man is confused. Let me clear that up RIGHT now:

EmPossibility Find your own job. I’ve got enough to do.

Do I *look* like an employment agency? Surely that’s the end of it. Oops, no. Stupidity all over my screen!

kiddmikey5 I got a job ,thought maybe u could find one a lil closer to you.

Yeaaaaah, I’m not creeped out at ALL by that. *eyeroll* Why the hell would I find *you* a job to bring you closer to me? This is our first conversation and CLEARLY you have no clue who or what you’re dealing with. There are enough jackasses in NC, I promise – we don’t need to import one from Up Nawth.

Be that as it may, this kid doesn’t know me so I’ll keep it succinct-