Wrecky Repost: ROCK STAR HOTNESS!
Craigslist Crazies, Worst Wrecks — By Jami on January 18, 2010 at 9:18 am
Thanks for the Submission, “Who Knows” (I know who you are )
ROCK STAR HOTNESS – 28 (LONDON, KY)
Sup ladies? I am a wild party man on the weekends and a business man on the weekdays. I love to dance in battles at the club. Go to concerts. I love to have intelligent conversations. I love tats piercings and people that dress with style. I just moved here to London , KY and had my lil brother move up here. We don’t know anyone and are looking to have a night life. My myspace username is epicmaru if you want to read my profile
Alright, so yea. He looks like a douche bag. He said “sup”. He likes to dance in battles in the club *sputtering laughter* He likes intelligent conversations? Alright, that’s it!
[jami guffaws]
*ahem*
Sorry, y’all. I’m back.
So, per his advice, I went to his myspace page. And can I just say, as a disclaimer to all the douchey people out there – you might want to g’head and make your myspace private.
I’m just sayin’.
Ok. Here’s the link, and here’s the details:
From his Interests Column:
My first love is physics. I often wounder to myself how strange it must be going though life not knowing or caring why things work the way they do. Why are we here? What is the meaning of life? How did the stars form. What is everything made up of? Can we travel in time? What is energy? Why are some people lazy and other hard workers? Where did gravity come from? Is their a God? What is Gods plan. In the study of physics both classical mechanics and quantum mechanics what we find helps answer a lot of questions but, we always find the most fascinating things we never thought possible. My second love is anime. It seems the use of physics is mastered in their universe and this I love. My third love is japan. What a great culture. They are very well educated, very clean, innovative with technology, and have a great pride. I also love dancing,rock concerts and making money and talking about politics and the culture war.
Physics? I’m supposed to believe that? I’m also supposed to believe that this douche bag sits around pondering the universe? With that bandana on his head? REALLY?
And can we also touch on his location? London, Kentucky, eh?
MAN. This looks like the PERFECT place for a dude who loves Japanese culture!
(OMG, I just had a Virgin Noodlespitz flash back: “I just love how women in Asian cultures shuffle their feet and act meek.”)
Aaaaaand how about some more pictures to, um… Verify his, *gulp* hotness.
Dude. I’m not going to lie. I used to do some drugs in my day. This looks like day four of a meth binge weekend. Nobody says they want to be a physics loving junkie when they grow up, do they?
Caption: “Oh man I am a dork.”
Yes. Yes you are.
EPIC? EPIC?
Epic FAIL of a tattoo dude. Oh, and also? Those Japanese characters that sort of stream across his chest say “Dumbass American’t”. I’ve verified it.
Ok. So we’ve got earrings. We’ve got a lip ring. We’ve got douche bag highlights and so-hard-it-will-cut-you hurr. We’ve got tribal tattoos. We’ve got a puka bead on leather twine necklace. We’ve got a wifebeater… We’ve got -
[EXPLOSION.]
I apologize. My brain just burst from all the douche.
I’ll leave you with the wise words of Douchey Mc”Hotness”:
Theirs an old saying. “yesterdays history, tomorrow is a mystery, but today is special thats why it is called present”
Originally Posted on February 25, 2009
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17 Comments
Dear God. If only his first love was the English language, we’d all be a lot happier. *cringe* Ok, off to read more. Haven’t even gotten to the myspace page yet.
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Dear God. If only his first love was the English language, we’d all be a lot happier. *cringe* Ok, off to read more. Haven’t even gotten to the myspace page yet.
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Seriously? his myspace, I can’t get enough of it, or the people who comment on it. That’s some myspace goodness, right there.
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OMG! This dude is messed up! I am scared for my daughters when they reach dating age. Arranged marriage looks better and better. I just can’t believe any of these guys think they are marketable.
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How could he claim to love physics and not even mention the Double-Slit experiment? I wounder (<– intentional) how physics ties in with the meaning of life, since traditionally that is philosophy or religion.
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OMG. At first I thought you were being a little too hard on this guy. I thought, who knows, maybe he was raised in a poorer area and he just dresses the same way his friend do? Nothing wrong with that. And I have become immune to typos in my time with online dating, so it didn’t seem that bad.
But the MySpace page started to leave a bad feeling in my stomach…and then there were the pictures. I’m not gonna lie, I thought he was hispanic. The fact that he’s a white guy living in London, KY, who dresses like he’s hispanic? OMG.
The gross crunchy hair? I don’t think girls EVER liked that, but if they did, it was in 1996. And his “Japanese” tattoos? Are not Japanese, or Chinese, or Korean, or any other real language as far as I know, and I’m a linguist. They’re just…random slashes that look like pound signs. *sigh*
The worst part is that he has very pretty eyes and would be kind of cute if he weren’t such a sad sad little boy.
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You’ve heard of Vin Diesel in “xXx”? This guy is “###”.
Super Lurve
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A+. Would lol again.
He actually *would* be kind of cute if he wasn’t so ridiculous, though.
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If I ever have a bad day, I will always remember him and feel better about myself.
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So, I think he’s a little confused about the word “physics”. On his myspace page, under companies it said Drying Physics. It also says he earns $100,000 a year, so I was intrigued…perhaps I am in the wrong career (physics teacher). If you google “drying physics” (which I did), the second hit is a water damage repair company in London, KY. So…my question is, what does removing mold from carpets have to do with physics? Did he just like the way it sounded? So many questions!
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He’s located in London, Kentucky.
So yeah, that’s him.
Also:
“About me:
I am a spiritual being. I am part of the greater conciseness.”
Gotta love it.
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If this guy was part of the greater conciseness, I think we’d all be a lot happier, if less amused.
I can’t help thinking that, “I am finding out the depths of my ignorance on my personal path to obtain a fraction of the universal knowledge that is everywhere. I am trying to do my part to help everyone around me,” is supposed to read, “I am trying to do my part to help everyone around me find out the depths of my ignorance.”
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nope. All of it together just means: “I like to do a lot of e.”
Super Lurve
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I love how nestled between all the half naked myspace bimbos he has on his friends list is the typical douche using the “fascist/socialist” image of Obama republicans love to use.
BTW, what is he thinking linking people to his Myspace? Is a girl really going to look at his myspace and think “gee, look at all these half-naked girls he friended! He seems like a real gentleman!”
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This reminds me of an article in The Onion headlined something like, “Naked Women in Dorm Posters fail to Result in Actual Naked Women in Dorm Room”
Super Lurve
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Good thing he makes over $100,000 per year, because you know he spends about half of that on hair products.
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haahaha!
I know I’m behind on the times, but the “The More You Know” was freakin’ hysterical.
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