You know what is the GREATEST thing about the internet?
Finding soundtracks to go along with the posts here… So, g’head and click play and then scroll down and read the Craigslist submission from Tara (Hi Tara!!!) and get ready to start a new life.
(As an aside, I have no speakers at work — Oh em gee, you’re posting at work, Jami?! — Yes, okay. Shut up. So, I just looked up lyrics to this song and it was creepy enough that I thought it would fit. I don’t, however, know the song and am hoping I knocked this one out of the park. Cross your fingers!)
ANYONE WANT A SUGAR DADDY$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$
$$$$$$ a pic a must
NO PIC WILL NOT GETA REPLY
THE BETTER THE PIC THE FASTER I WILLGET BACK TO YOU
Now, I know… You’re thinking, “But Jami… Those serapes are going to leave me terribly itchy!” But they won’t, see… Because he’s going to CLOAK your entire body in dirty fifty dollar bills AND the best sterling silver (plated) jewelry money can buy!
Guess what, low-budget Splenda Daddy? If you were in a really isolated place, I could see how your presentation might have the potential to sweep someone a little less, shall we say… in-demand. But you live in Philadelphia. I’m pretty sure the women in Philadelphia aren’t going to be interested in you.
And holmes… Guess what?
I can make friendship bracelets look shiny.
Just because it sparkles doesn’t mean it’s expensive. Seriously.
Take all the money from pawning the title to your trailer and go find yourself an around-average hooker and call it a night, man.
