Archive for the ‘OkStupid’ Category

I CAN’T STOP

I CAN’T STOP
Seriously, I have too much shit to be doing right now. I almost think I might pull an all-nighter, but I think I’m too old for that. Plus, I have to be up LATE tomorrow night for my Write Club event! Sweet Jesus, I’m nervous! If you’re in the Atlanta area and you are NOT going to Dragon*Con,...
September 2nd, 2010 | OkStupid | Read More

Cold Calls: It’s Not Just For Sales

Cold Calls: It’s Not Just For Sales
The WORST thing about dating online (besides surprise cock) is the random, cold-call style instant message. So you saw my profile and thought you might be interested in talking to me? Okay, that’s fine. And then you realized I was online right now? REFRAIN you dullard! If you can’t take the...
September 1st, 2010 | OkStupid | Read More

“but i do love big breasts Ilove them all”

“but i do love big breasts Ilove them all”
Oh, old men. When will you figure out that online dating just doesn’t work for your demographic!?? candyman1945 The Octopus: I NEED SOMEONE TO LOVE 64 year old Man Cocoa, Florida Interests WOMEN MAKING LOVE MOTORCYCLES COOKING KISSING HANDHOLDING MOVIES COUNTRY MUSIC About Me I dont have...
August 24th, 2010 | Worst Wrecks | Read More

Self-Absorbed Asshole Ahead

Self-Absorbed Asshole Ahead
He peeped my profile and as soon as I saw what appeared to be a semi-nude picture, I knew I had to go sniffin’ for something wrecktastic. First, his profile… My Self-Summary I am athletic and fit — I am a member of a Fitness Club where I work out. During the summer I swim 2 miles...
July 13th, 2010 | OkStupid, Worst Wrecks | Read More

Nobody Saw This Coming. Nobody.

Nobody Saw This Coming. Nobody.
I… I’m, um… I mean, I’m not going to use too commentary here because I feel like there will be more material here for you guys. Just… Look. FREEBODYGUARD4U 34 / M / Straight / Single Atlanta, Georgia My Self-Summary THIS is my SECOND PROFILE i have another BETTER one...
June 24th, 2010 | OkStupid | Read More

I wish I could turn this into a cartoon

I wish I could turn this into a cartoon
Well kids, it was bound to happen. Our first ever post removal. Originally, the space in this post was full of wrecky instant messaging behavior, but per the terms of our website, the wreck has requested that the post be removed. Now, I’m not in the business of ruining lives just, you know, mocking...
June 22nd, 2010 | Apologies, OkStupid | Read More

The Art Of The Email, The Finale

The finale to Saturday’s installment of The Art Of The Email is pretty predictable, I think… But it’s still funny. If you didn’t read it, you should go take care of that right now. It’s okay. I’ll wait here until you come back. … We good? All caught up? Okay. Him: Jun....
June 13th, 2010 | OkStupid | Read More

The Art Of The Email

Email exchange I just had: Him: hi Jun. 11, 2010 – 5:54pm Do you really believe in this online match stuff?… Me: Jun. 12, 2010 – 10:05am Nope. To be fair, I hadn’t even looked at his profile yet, but seriously… You read my profile and were compelled to write to me and THAT is the...
June 12th, 2010 | OkStupid | Read More

That’ll Be Two Points For Donna

That’ll Be Two Points For Donna
Man, I love submissions like this! Donna sends this one in: I just got this IM conversation from this guy http://www.okcupid.com/profile/ChicagoChris4u [11:35:02 am]ChicagoChris4u:knock knock [11:37:00 am]me:yes? [11:38:00 am]ChicagoChris4u:it’s just Mr. tall, adventuraous, and educated….oh…and...
June 6th, 2010 | OkStupid | Read More

She’s Not Much For Cuddling

She’s Not Much For Cuddling
Jess got this very eloquent email correspondence in her OkStupid account recently and shared it with us: hey do you wanna come over and cuddle Yea… That’s it. That’s all he said. Jess’s email to me said: Of course I didn’t respond, because I don’t want to “come...
June 1st, 2010 | OkStupid | Read More